#1
Why did the can crusher quit his job?
Because it was soda pressing.
Tap to reveal
#2
I got fired from the calendar factory.
All I did was take a day off.
Tap to reveal
#3
Why did the scarecrow get a promotion?
He was outstanding in his field.
Tap to reveal
#4
What do you call a factory that makes okay products?
A satisfactory.
Tap to reveal
#5
I used to work at a shoe recycling shop.
It was sole-destroying.
Tap to reveal
#6
My boss told me to have a good day...
So I went home.
Tap to reveal
#7
Why did the man quit his job at the orange juice factory?
Because he couldn't concentrate.
Tap to reveal
#8
What do you call a sleeping bull?
A bulldozer.
Tap to reveal
#9
Why don't some couples go to the gym?
Because some relationships don't work out.
Tap to reveal
#10
I got a job at a bakery because...
I kneaded dough.
Tap to reveal
#11
Why did the teacher wear sunglasses?
Because her students were so bright.
Tap to reveal
#12
What did the tie say to the hat?
You go on ahead, I'll hang around.
Tap to reveal
#13
Why did the employee bring a ladder to work?
To reach new heights in their career.
Tap to reveal
#14
What's the best day to go to the beach?
Sun-day.
Tap to reveal
#15
I told my boss three companies were after me.
He asked which ones. I said the gas, electric, and water company.
Tap to reveal
#16
Why couldn't the accountant sleep?
He had too much on his balance sheet.
Tap to reveal
#17
What did the zero say to the eight?
Nice belt.
Tap to reveal
#18
Why did the laptop go to the doctor?
It had a virus.
Tap to reveal
#19
My first job was at a clock factory.
The hours were good.
Tap to reveal
#20
Why don't some jobs at the mirror factory last long?
People can see right through them.
Tap to reveal
#21
Why did the coffee file a police report?
It got mugged at work.
Tap to reveal
#22
I quit my job at the helium factory.
I refused to be spoken to in that tone.
Tap to reveal
#23
What do lawyers wear to court?
Lawsuits.
Tap to reveal
#24
Why did the electrician close his business?
He couldn't resist.
Tap to reveal
#25
My job at the coffee shop was...
A whole latte work.
Tap to reveal
#26
Why did the astronaut break up with his girlfriend?
He needed more space.
Tap to reveal
#27
What do you call a lazy carpenter?
A slacker.
Tap to reveal
#28
I applied for a job at the paper shredder company.
But they said my resume was too long.
Tap to reveal
#29
Why did the banker quit her job?
She lost interest.
Tap to reveal
#30
I got a job as a historian.
There's no future in it.
Tap to reveal
#31
What do you call an office worker who does nothing?
Well rested.
Tap to reveal
#32
Why is the marketing department so cool?
They have lots of fans.
Tap to reveal
#33
I used to work at a parking lot.
But my boss told me I was doing a terrible job and I should valet go.
Tap to reveal
#34
Why did the janitor jump in the closet at work?
Supplies!
Tap to reveal
#35
My resume is a work of fiction.
My interviews are performance art.
Tap to reveal
#36
Why was the broom late to the meeting?
It over-swept.
Tap to reveal
#37
What do you call a fake stone in Ireland?
A sham rock.
Tap to reveal
#38
Why did the envelope go to the hospital?
It had a paper cut.
Tap to reveal
#39
My boss said I should dress for the job I want.
Now I'm in trouble for wearing a Batman costume.
Tap to reveal
#40
I told my boss I needed a raise. He said: name one good reason.
Two words: inadequate. salary.
Tap to reveal
#41
Why was the spreadsheet feeling sad?
It had too many cells.
Tap to reveal
#42
Why did the painter quit?
He couldn't handle the brush-off.
Tap to reveal
#43
I'm great at multitasking.
I can waste time, be unproductive, and procrastinate all at once.
Tap to reveal
#44
My job at the keyboard factory wasn't great.
I didn't get enough shifts.
Tap to reveal
#45
Why did the resume go to therapy?
It had too many gaps.
Tap to reveal
#46
I had a job crushing cans.
It was soda pressing.
Tap to reveal
#47
Why don't we tell secrets at the office?
Too many Windows.
Tap to reveal
#48
What do you call a computer that sings at work?
A-Dell employee.
Tap to reveal
#49
Why did the stapler break up with the paper?
They kept getting into binds.
Tap to reveal
#50
I'm writing a book about reverse psychology.
Please don't buy it.
Tap to reveal