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Dad Joke Calendar — September 2026

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1I told my wife she was drawing her eyebr...2What's the best thing about Switzerland?...3Why can't a bicycle stand on its own? (r...4What do you call a fish without eyes? (r...5I'm on a seafood diet. (remix)...6What did the grape do when it got steppe...
7Why don't skeletons fight each other? (r...8What do you call a lazy kangaroo? (remix...9How does a penguin build its house? (rem...10Why did the coffee file a police report?...11What do you call a factory that makes ok...12Why did the golfer bring two pairs of pa...13What do you call cheese that isn't yours...
14I wouldn't buy anything with velcro. (re...15What do you call a sleeping dinosaur? (r...16How do trees access the internet? (remix...17What's brown and sticky? (remix)...18What do you call a man with a rubber toe...19I just watched a program about beavers. ...20What do you call a belt made of watches?...
21Why did the stadium get hot after the ga...22How do you make an egg roll? (remix)...23What's orange and sounds like a parrot? ...24How do you organize a space party? (remi...25Why do chicken coops only have two doors...26What did the janitor say when he jumped ...27I'm afraid for the calendar. (remix)...
28Why don't oysters share their pearls? (r...29What do you call a deer with no eyes? (r...30How do you make a tissue dance? (remix)...

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